100th Post!!! [and new scar pics!]

Wow... I can't believe this is my 100th post...what a journey it has been.... pain...fear...pain...validation...relief...pain...hope...and the possibility of...freedom...amazing really...Am I any wiser after 100 posts? Maybe...maybe not. What I know for sure...today...when I started the blog on 6/3/07...I didn't anticipate how many people would view it...how many people would come on this journey with me. I didn't anticipate that other people with PVNS would be grateful...I had hoped that, but it is amazing to have realized it. I know that I have a lot to be thankful for...my doctor here, my doc in Boston...my family, my friends...high toilet seats...walkers...crutches...modesty (not having to have sponge baths from nurses!)...painkillers...physical therapy...being able to depend on people...laughter...tears... it has been quite a journey...(New pics..scroll down...)

Ok...enough reflecting... oh yeah... I also know that Kenny is missing!!! Yep... I saw a sign today on my way to PT that said Kenny is Missing, under which there was a picture of a beautiful siamese cat...I hope Kenny is ok...random, yes, but these are the things I think about. I had PT today, and as usual, while I waited there were other patients in the waiting area. Patients....hmmm...does that mean I am unwell? Hadn't thought of that until now....I don't want to think of myself as a patient...as being sick... I am not sick...but need help....so where does that put me.... anyway...as I sat there another patient...person...who I had seen before asked how I was doing, if I was progressing. It seems typical at a PT office that those who are waiting share their war stories and scars...I met one man who was one of those "one -uppers"... he had worse scars... (or so he thought..HA!) ...he had more surgeries...more doctors...more specialists...could offer names of chiropractors or doctors to anyone there...and said he could himself, probably physically adjust someone... EEK.. no thanks.... Another man who was there today does not weigh in on many conversations...I think because his English is not so great and he struggles trying to get his ideas across... well today three of us sat...and somehoe Boston came up in the conversation...the older man, who speaks littlel English, had some opinions about Boston....strong enough, so that he shared his view...talked to us...Seven years ago he had been mugged in Boston and was in a coma for 80 days because of it...someone snuck up on him and hit him in the back of his head...and stole his $13.00..... interesting stories... we all have...I hope Kenny's story has a happy ending...

PT hurt today...again... but I did the bike today for ten minutes again and got a full rotation on my first try, which is cause for celebration. The parts that hurt most are the hamstring massage...OUCH... today I could have sworn the guy was cutting my incision open again and again...ouchie.... then... after that He put a rolled up towel...rolled up THICK towel...under my lower calf, close to my ankle. then... he pushes on my knee...with one hand below my kneecap and one above it...and he pushes down until I flinch...and I gotta say I let him go pretty far. Then...after that I have to bend it... after forcing it straight...the bending...well...SUCKS...a lot... then...I had to do the electric stimulation again...after ten minutes of that my leg was tired... then...there's more??? Yep.... then PT guy had me walk without my crutch...hello....didn't you just witness that torture dude? You think I will be able to walk well??? Hmmm??? well the first few steps were not pretty, but eventually I got into a rhythym and did ok. He was happy...of course in one of the last steps I felt like my leg was giving out on me, but I caught myself...and he said that when I walk any distance I should have at least one crutch...two in crowded areas....still.....

While I am complaining a bit about the PT I know it helps... I feel stronger...I am stronger. PVNS has tested me...and for a while I think I was failing...feared I would fail..completely... and I am now starting to think I will pass...perhaps ace it...I know it's early...and there won't be an MRI until January or even February...that will truly allow me to exhale...but...I am hopeful...

Ok... since this is the 100th post... I will post new pics of the scars...taken today... PRETTY... huh??? Of course the left one is the front...and the right is the back....Getting better.... Thank you all for being on this road with me... I appreciate and love you all!