Scattered thoughts...

I worked today... taking tolls... it was the third day in a row... tomorrow will be day 4... It's not a glamourous job... and yes people ask about whether or nit we sell toll house cookies... but it's a decent job. Because of the way my mind works...I like to watch the people who come through. Yesterday there was this lady... who most people would say appeared as a soccer mom... she had the mini van... the middle aged practical haircut... not too long, but long enough to pull back when taking care of kids... she pulled up to the tolls with her windows up... which is when I made my soccer mom judgement... when she put her window down to pay... I searched the van for teenagers...hip hop teenagers.. but there were none... this woman was cranking some hip hop music... soccer mom getting freaky with it... some people are polite and answer me when I ask how their day is going... other people look at me like I have four heads... and put out their hand awaiting change. Ok... there are different styles to paying a toll... there is the throw and go... people who are perhaps, a little germ phobic an see me, the toll collector, as covered with germs... so they toss the coins into my hand without making any contact. Then there are the folders... people who think that folding the money somehow makes it easier to pass... and get highly annoyed when I take time to unfold the bill before I give them their change... then there are the smart toll payers... who announce to me how much money they are giving me... good thing... because I can't count or read the dollar amount on the bills....

Today... there were some attractive toll payers... some with gold, some without... but how can a girl working in a toll booth hit on a guy? Hey honey... is that a roll of quarters in your pocket or??... Hi. I don't know your name, but your toll paying profile tells me that you are considerate and personable... want to go out? Hey... here's your change...your receipt... and my number... call me! Hey Cutie... YOU get to go for free... IF you give me your number... ok... I admit... I try to check out something about the guy by their car and/or clothes. What man doesn't like to be complimented on their vehicle? And... sports is a huge thing... But... it's at most... a 15 second interaction... but... there are some hotties out there...

Today I got to work with some people I haven't seen in over a year.. because I took that amount of time off the tolls because it hurt... and then surgery... etc... and so I had a lot of questions thrown at me...and sweetly they told me the scars weren't that bad... then I got to work next to the man I have written about before... the one who had the stripper 'girlfriend'... he was better this time... his topics of conversation didn't include anything about her.. thank god!

I went to the gym this morning, before going to work. I didn't go yesterday because I was tired and my body hurt from all I had done last week... so I listened to my body and took yesterday off... I think it paid off... and today I only did the bike.. but I did 11 miles in 30 minutes... which I think is decent. I will go tomorrow and do some weight training and maybe the elliptical. I have added a lot of music to my MP3 player... because I was getting a little bored and unmotivated by the same stuff... so I am excited because I added stuff on thursday and haven't even begun to listen to it all. Today I read while on the bike... which I won't do again... music works way better.

I have decided that when I see my doc in Boston next summer... he will say, WOW... Kim, you look so great... how have you done it? I will tell him that I was able to be active and ate well... and am feeling better than ever! I am not going to put pressure on myself to lose the 100 pounds I had regained since the onset of PVNS... but I am going to lose at least 50 by then... I am trying not to focus as much on the numbers as I am on feeling healthy. But I know that the weight will come off... as a byproduct of eating well and being active... and that feels good.. I feel empowered to control my health and activities again. I like feeling empowered...

Healthy healthy healthy!!!