End of 2011

I just got home from the gym and am having a hard time typing because miss Lucy had decided it is time to cuddle.  My cats have all been very cuddly since I got back from Christmas, very cute...and at times inconvenient.

So for those who know me will not be surprised that I am reflecting on 2011.. me? Thinking, analyzing? Of course.

A lot happened in 2011... Perhaps the highlight was earning my masers degree and graduating.  Yahoo!  Graduation was back in May and I am still adjusting to not taking classes.  It is strange for me to not have to be out a coupe of nights a week and to not have to be writing papers.  I am still very much seeking a new job and hope that 2012 will bring a new job for me.

Other things that stand out in my mind... 2011 is the year my grandmother, on my dad's side, died...an amazing woman who I cherish...  the year one of my best friends, Debbie, was faced with the biggest battle of her life, breast cancer... which she is battling well!  She is AMAZING and much stronger than she gives herself credit for... It was the year I accepted my first marriage proposal... well not to get married, but to perform a wedding.  Suellen and her fiance will be married in May of 2012 and I will be there as their officiant!  2011 marked the second anniversary of Mom's death and our third Christmas without her... we welcomed Betty into our lives, what a wonderful gift she has been! Dad is selling his house and now lives with Betty at the lake, the beautiful lake... Mom would approve...

In 2011 I was afraid that PVNS had returned, but am happy to report that it isn't and there is a good chance that after my next MRI, that I can stop having MRIs looking for it!  (I would love that!)  It's also the year I faced another fear and  returned to the dentist after a very long hiatus... too long... but am not up to date and have a healthy smile. It's the year where I let my walls down with a man and fell in love, fell hard... and knowing what I know now, am grateful, very grateful we broke up. And while I admit that hurt me and makes me very cautious to trust someone else in a new relationship... also taught me to be who I am and to let myself love and be loved... something I was afraid, after losing Mom, I would not let myself do... In 2011 I gave myself permission to be happy... that even when grieving it is okay to be happy... and yes, I am still grieving...

In February I lost Tess, the first cat I had as an adult... she was a great feline friend...

 2011 was filled with friendships, old and new.  I got to see Jill and her family... I got to see Rico in Boston...I got to spend time with my friends here, got to see Maria grow and be healthy and celebrate her first birthday... and I got to make a new FRIEND, Michael, whose friendship has become something I not only adore, but depend on...

In 2011 I also got to spend time with Sal... someone who has been in my life, well in and out of my life, for twelve years... I am grateful for him, for the time we share, and for his... adoration... friendship ...playfulness...and competitive nature... .He helps me be in the moment, enjoy life, and appreciate things... He makes me feel beautiful and smart and funny... and I appreciate what we have and no longer long for what we don't...it is what it is, my Mom would say... and I no longer have the need to define it!

2011 was a year of teaching amazing students, connecting with adolescents who inspire me to be better, to do better... and of whom I am so proud... a year in which I confronted teachers who needed to be confronted...2011 has given me the confidence and the desire  to move forward in my career...

It was also a year of questioning religion and faith... attending church in a couple of different places... the year where I have found myself wanting to believe in something greater... but am still not convinced that traditional religion is where I will find that... For me... I feel closest to whatever that power is... while kayaking...

Kayaking was a big part of 2011 for me... I started in late April I think... and was able to kayak through November 20th... that's almost 8 months of kayaking!  That is a record for me.  And I got some amazing pictures... spent time with beautiful nature... plants and animals...I went to so many new places, including salt water marshes/rivers...  I got to share my passion for kayaking with others and also got to truly enjoy the solitude of being out in my kayak solo...

2011... A pretty good year overall... I am very excited to see what 2012 holds for me and for my friends and family.  I look forward to new experiences while holding onto and appreciating things form the past... I wish the same for all of you!