A cold, A cellphone, and 300 cows...

What a week!
Last weekend I worked a shift on the tolls and partway through the day I felt like I was getting a cold.  That afternoon I went to a soccer game and then went out to celebrate a friend's birthday.  By the end of the evening I knew I had a cold.  Sunday I slept most of the day... and felt pretty crappy on Monday.  Tuesday my symptoms subsided a bit and I thought I was in a better place... then I got no sleep Tuesday night (will explain that later) and felt awful on Wednesday.  Wednesday night I slept great and felt better Thursday, was just tired... and had a long day, left home around 6 a.m. and got home at about 9 pm... today was also a long day work, then I went to a cross country meet, came home and found Jacey here picking up her laundry and we decided to go to dinner together, and then tonight I went to a home football game, my first of the season... (Our team got destroyed....)  I am feeling much better.  The great news, is that even with having a bad cold, and the craziness of the week (to be described further) I am still happy!  Very happy.  I am so excited to be where I am.. it is the exact right place for me.

So... the week... overall the days were not that eventful... until yesterday and today... Yesterday one of my students who is on probation (with a sad history that makes my heart break) left school..... not a good choice... he left because the program he is involved with tried to enforce a rule that he had to hand over his cell phone in order to participate in a field trip.  He refused.  After school I had a meeting with a parent and another staff member.  Wow... crazy.  I am constantly shaking my head about how absurd some parents can be.  So bold.  So rude. So disrespectful.  My job was to witness the meeting and to help contain the parent.  It was interesting.  I was glad I was there to support this other person.  And to document.  People often wonder why kids act the way they do... two words answer that.... apple...tree...

I also had a lot of meetings this week, with parents, students, and teachers.  Not IEP meetings, but what are called 504 meetings... which is a way to provide accommodations to kids who do not require special education services.  Way easier than IEPs, but still meetings that require paperwork.  Much much LESS paperwork than before, so It's all good!

Today... perhaps my most difficult and most rewarding day... the student who bailed on school yesterday... met with him this morning to break the news about his in school suspension... we first talked about yesterday and his choice and he got so defensive... that it was his phone that he had paid for and nobody was going to take it from him.  I knew there was something more to the cell phone than he was saying... so I told him that because he chose to leave school grounds he needed to spend part of the day with me for in school...which caused him to take off, again.  This put his probation at risk, big time.  I was told that he was gone, no reason to really try to get him back.  So after contacting his parole officer I tried to call his parent.  Instead he answered the phone and he was freaking out.  FREAKING out... crying, screaming, so overwhelmed.  My heart hurt so bad for this kid.  I told him that he had no reason to trust me, that he doesn't know me outside of the few interactions we had, but that I asked him to give me a chance... I talked to him for about 20 minutes... and eventually he shared that he was overwhelmed dealing with so many things including a terminally ill parent... and it dawned on me... that when Mom was sick, my phone felt, in ways, like my lifeline.  I was convinced that I had to have it on me, an don, and be ready to answer at any moment to hear the news I had been dreading... and not having it was something that would have been something I could not have handled... not having my phone... so I asked him...straight out... and it caused him to cry harder and I knew I was onto something... and so I asked him about options for his phone in future field trips and came up with an agreement... and then approached the idea of him returning to school... he wasn't sure.  I told him that it was his choice, but that I would love for him to come back. And told him it would be a better choice for him based on his status with the probation stuff.  He wasn't sure and was still worked up and so I asked him if I could give him some think time and then called him back in 10 minutes and...made him promise he would answer when I called back.  He agreed.  That was a pretty long ten minutes... I was afraid he wouldn't answer my call a second time... but.. he did.  And he came back to school.  And he talked with me and the social worker he has known for a while... and this kid poured his heart out... I feel so honored that he shared with me what he shared.  This kids  is poetic.  The way he expressed his feelings... like 'I feel like I am covered in gas running away from the fire...'  was amazing... The social worker said that she was surprised he opened up like that, that in the two years they have worked together he had not been able to share what he shared... she shared some of his history with me... and it's unconscionable It was so hard ot not break into tears with him... HE was able to calm down... eat lunch (Hadn't eaten in 3-4 days) and relax and actually get a little school work done... which is so not the priority for this kid... I was pleased tonight when he saw me at the football game that he approached me and had a good conversation about the game.  Such a good kid whose circumstances destroyed his innocence... and he learned to to fight back... hard.  He is a survivor.  I know there are lots of tough days ahead with him... but know that today inroads were laid... and I am pleased... after that was over (which brought me to about noon) and I had just settled into start calling a few kids to my office... a teacher appeared with a student who had gotten the worse end of a fight... was beaten up pretty badly.... which meant making sure he was safe, the other kids was safe, investigating the details, deciding about suspensions and contacting home.  I am thankful for the other Assistant Principal.. I am learning a lot from him.  He was out of the building when the fight happened but returned before the consequences were given and helped me decide the outcomes...

Oh.. I forgot to explain the sleepless night... A few weeks ago I got a call from my old principal.  He told me that three of the special education files I worked on last year were missing.  That they had not made it to the high school.  Which I knew was garbage because I took them ALL over myself.  I took a couple of trips, one where I met with one of the high school spec. ed teachers and watched her shove the files randomly into file cabinets wherever they fit... and another where I left files in the guidance office on a shelf.  The principal seemed happy with my explanation of where the files would be.  On Tuesday my lovely ex coworkers planned a party for me at my old school.  It was really sweet.  On my way out the principal stops me and again asks about files, saying the missing number was now 6.  He also told me that the spec ed director was pretty upset and that he had to say to her, "Why would Kim take the files? What motivation would she have?" So... to me this means she was making accusations that I had dome something intentional to misplace the files.  NUTS.  I again told him where i had taken the files and he said ok.  That night one of my closest friends from my old job called me (After I had already been sleeping for about an hour) and said she hated to bother me, knew I was sick, and knew I was exhausted, but felt she needed to give me a heads up.  The spec. ed director had cornered her and had asked for my new address... because of the missing files she wanted to send me a letter.  My friend refused to give her my address... Now... when I moved I notified my old district because I will need my W2s, etc.  So I fully believe this was a ploy to intimidate my friend ... then proceeded to hint that something like misplacing or withholding files could be career ending for someone... My friend took it to mean that she meant MY Career.  Now, keep in mind, this woman NEVER called me directly.  Never had any conversation with me about it.  which is sooo unprofessional... and the fact she is saying such things is damaging to my reputation.  I was pissed.  My friend said that the director even insinuated that maybe in my move I had put them in a box that was somewhere in my house.  So... after talking with her it was now 10:00 at night and I, sick as I was, got out of bed, paranoid, and looked in every unopened box in my guest room and in my basement... and of course found no special ed files.  I was so upset that this woman was questioning my integrity.  How dare she? How dare she talk about me to other people and make accusations? I stewed all night.  No sleep.  Then when I got up to go to work at 5:00 I checked my facebook page after having sent a message to the spec ed teacher at the high school to see if she had searched where I had told them to look... and lo and behold there was a message from my old principal... he emailed me a message he had received at about 7 pm that evening (a call would have been nice) that the spec ed teacher at the high school was in an IEP meeting in the guidance office, looked at the shelves and noticed... Yup.. SIX spec. ed files... exactly where I said they were.  Exactly where they have been in past years... I was relieved and angry all at the same time.  Not to mention cranky from not sleeping... I am deciding how to respond.

Oh...Cows.. So.. one day this week, Weds. I think it was.  I met, along with the other Asst principal and our truancy specialist met with a mother of a child who wanted to register at our school... a student with a lot of history.  The mother was from a country in Africa and when we met I could tell she liked my height.  At the end of the meeting when I said good bye to her she said to me.. you are so tall it is so wonderful... in my country in order to marry you a man would have to pay your family 300 cows to wed you.  300 cows??!!  HOLY COW!  She was not being rude at all... just sharing her appreciation for me... now of course that word traveled quickly and cow jokes will be common this year... and on the way out the other asst. principal, who is about 5'6, said.. well if she's worth 300 cows, what am I worth.. she said... 2 monkeys!

This job is so different than my other job... in so many ways... but... the parts that are the same, working with kids who are the underdog, misunderstood, students who have not been appreciated and loved.... is the same.  My role is a little different, but... I was worried about being distanced from the kids... and I think now, more than ever, I am working with kids.  

So yes, I am tired.  But... happy... very very happy.